Belonging is a Two-Way Street

This is what everyone wants, to belong. To be a part of a community, to be accepted as we are. It doesn’t matter what side of the political spectrum we’re on, what race we are or what other identity groups we fall into. Everyone wants to be heard and accepted, to belong.

But this isn’t possible in a vacuum. One has to identify a community that will bring you in and hold you dear; one in which you can let your guard down, let loose and relax. So what do you do if there is no community out there who is “accepting new members?” Or what if all the seemingly neutral places where you can hang out, being yourself, hoping to attract others like you are being taken over by those who would rather be exclusive than inclusive?

Bullies abound.

It is profoundly sad to me that there are people out there who, instead of seeking belonging, will instead accept the false equivalence of being rewarded for tearing others down in order to maintain their status and their illusion of control.

It is primarily in childhood and when we near the end of our lives (in old age, anyway) when we have the opportunity to feel most connected, most loved and most at peace. But what happens in between? Do we all just become hardened through scarcity? We have to take from others what we feel should be rightfully ours? We aren’t willing or able to do the work of finding our place, building supportive relationships with others and most importantly, being vulnerable with each other to create and maintain connections. And we call this adulthood?

No, thank you.

I’m not willing to “go it alone.” I’m not willing to detach myself from my feelings or emotions in order to promote myself in this world. It is so much easier to promote others! I don’t need much, and others’ needs are so much greater. I will get more fulfillment in my life from helping others who have not had my privilege than I will hoarding money and energy that should not be mine to begin with, out of fear of not having enough.

And I trust in the universe that I will have what I need and provide it to me. I belong on this earth and my contributions, my thoughts, my energy, my words have value to others. I can and do make a difference. I can lead with my mind and heart open, to make and hold space for others so that they too can feel like they have somewhere to belong. By creating that space in my soul, I am completing the circle, providing the very sense of belonging to others who crave, but cannot find it. I am expanding the good in humanity, nurturing others, from the ground up, if need be.

This is my mission.

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